The Post That Almost Wasn't

I have not written lately as I have had a bad case of writers block.  The process has been write, erase, repeat over and over.  I do not know why - maybe being sick, maybe the stress of the realities of life, or maybe just children constantly interrupting.  I feel the fog of the block lifting but not quite there yet so do not expect anything profound or witty.


The eight chicks we got has now become seven.  We got up one morning to find Gabby's chick looking rather odd.  Over night it had almost feathered out all of it's wings and looked scruffy.  She would not stay with the other chicks and appeared tired.  I wanted Gabby to know she had done what she could for the little thing so we took the chick out and let her run around in the bedroom with one other chicks for company.  The chick did seem to perk up a little but was still not walking tall like the others, her little neck just seems to be contracted in a hunched position.  I had told Gabby to pray but be prepared for the worst.  The next morning her chick was dead.  She handled it at best as she could and Crystal the chick is now buried in a box in our backyard.


Being one that always believes God will provide, but also know that God has His own paths for us which is not always our first plan or thoughts, I have been praying a lot about how I am going to support us as the children grow up and move on with Jim being disabled.  This week a neighbor said I could sell my crafts in her store, another neighbor we found out has a restaurant and will buy all of her eggs from us (15 more chicks ordered today), and I purchased an antique vanity to restore.  The same neighbor that will let me sell my crafts in her store also said if I do a good job on this restoration, she will have me do all of her restoration work.  I also found a second walnut tree on the property and since I am allergic, I will be able to sell all of the walnuts that come from the tree.  God is providing in more ways than I ever thought.


On the note of blessings, a dear neighbor has given us so much food from his garden that my new to me freezer (thank you to a new friend at church for that gift) is almost completely full of green beans, zucchini, summer squash, corn, peppers, and tomato sauce.


I do not know what we have done to deserve so much love from so many. I do not know how I will ever give back as much as I have been given.  I am beginning to wonder if us coming into contact with so many other foster parents and all of these good tidings is not a sign for us to go back into foster care.  We cannot until we have lived here six months and honestly, I do not feel emotionally ready for it, nor would I bring a foster child into the home when we have a teen that has almost been arrested three times due to his anger issues around the other children.  I am praying on this a lot but feel God's path is heading us towards medically fragile children again.  We will see what He has in store for us.

It has been a week of hurrays for us.

First, the great news about the repairs on the house (see last blog).  Then, Jim got a second letter from Social Security confirming he will be getting SSDI and with back pay from December.  I am shocked since this was his first application for SSDI and we know many people are denied.  It reinforced in both of us how disabled he truly is.

Next, Gabby started attending camp for the first time.  After her initial fears wore off, she has loved it and is disappointed that it only lasts one week.  She has asked if she can do an all day camp even.

Dustin has a job with our neighbors doing whatever they need at their consignment shop and helping the husband clean out abandoned buildings.  The first building he will get to help with is an old jail that is on the historical registry.  Dustin has denied any payment for now since these wonderfully, kind people have been giving us clothing for the children, plants for our garden and Jim a new office chair he liked.  I told Dustin that is very admirable of him, but he needs to think about getting paid at some point so he has spending money.

Towards the end of the week I took Cameron, Ben, Gabby and Bella to VBS.  Bella did not want to go and was very adamant about not going.  I insisted since she had not made any friends yet.  I am so glad I did!  She had fun, made a friend, and there was a boy there she liked.  She came home and spent hours on the phone talking or texting with a friend in California about it.  It was so nice to see her acting like a typical child instead of the defiant, angry one that we have seen for weeks.  By Saturday Dustin had heard so much about VBS, that he decided he would go - but only this once and it was just to help with Cameron and he wasn't going to pray or anything like that.  I just sat there smiling and nodding at him.

I met another homeschooling mom of six at VBS.  We did not get much time to talk since she was a tribe leader and I had Cameron to chase.  Before we left on Friday, she offered a freezer to us for free.  We are arranging to pick it up next week and our neighbor is going to help us get it.  Neither one of them will allow us to pay them.  I guess I will be doing a lot of baking in the near future.


I am thanking God every day for the wonderful blessings he has brought to us.  We are definitely blessed and hope we can show the same love and caring for others in the near future.